Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize