For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
