I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
