I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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