OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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