when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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