She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize