Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
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