honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Randomize
