She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I had to cum in my sink.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize