I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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