why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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