I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
