Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Shame is for Republicans.
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