No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
