I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
