he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
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