I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
He felt like a one man threesome
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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