So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
