So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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