So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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