You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Randomize