Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
wow bdsm is so cute
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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