Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
