I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
