how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
do nipples grow back?
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