At least make sure they are 18
Why
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize
