You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
