In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
He has the fingertips of a God
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