the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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