I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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