Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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