Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
