I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
