my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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