okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
