last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Randomize
