I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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