i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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