So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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