It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize