Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
