normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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