at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
