I'm lost and stupid without you.
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
he shaved USA in his pubs
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
