It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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