but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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