that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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