If i come over, it means nothing
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
