In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Someone shit on the floor
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Just puked most of my soul out..
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